No Cure for the Broken Hearted
Katherine
Spencer is an
up-and-coming architect in
| Kenneth Rosenberg |
|
No Cure for the Broken Hearted Katherine
Spencer is an
up-and-coming architect in |
Chapter One “Ohhh!” she said to herself as she looked down at her latte-covered shoes. “Rough morning?” asked a tall, attractive man in a grey business suit as he moved toward her across the lobby. He had sparkling blue eyes and short dark hair with just a hint of gray to match the color of his suit. Katherine eyed him with a look of embarrassment mixed with apprehension. This man was far too handsome. Handsome strangers made her nervous. She never knew what to do, or what to say. Without giving an answer, she reached down and began picking up her things one at a time. “Let me help you with those,” the man continued, reaching for one of her tubes. “Thank you,” she replied. As the man held out the tube, he cocked his head to one side. Katherine saw his eyes wander down the length of her pressed black skirt, lingering on her toned calves. He looked back up without a hint of shame. Katherine’s long brown hair was up in a bun, but he seemed fixated on the few wayward strands caressing either side of her face. Katherine shuddered at this unexpected attention. Best to ignore it, she thought, taking her tube from his grasp. With her other hand, Katherine picked up her empty coffee cup. She looked around her at the mess all over the floor. “I’ll take care of that,” came the voice of Evan, the building’s concierge, as he hurried across from his desk. “Don’t you worry ‘bout a ting, Ms. Spencer!” he added, his Jersey City roots showing in his accent. “Evan, you treat me too well,” she replied. “Not a problem. Anyting for you, Ms. Spencer!” The elevator opened now and the man in the suit walked inside holding a hand on the doors for Katherine. He looked back with one raised eyebrow. “Going up?” he asked. “Yes, thanks,” said Katherine, as Evan helped load her arms with the rest of her things. She made her way into the elevator car as the man released the doors. “Floor?” he asked. “Forty-two.” He pushed the button and then hit “40” for himself. “What’s in the tubes?” he said as the car shot skyward. “Blueprints.” “Taking work home?” “They say I’m compulsive that way,” she answered as the numbers ticked by. She couldn’t help but sneak a sideways glance at the man. No ring on his finger. Maybe she should actually talk to him. She couldn’t even remember how long it had been since she’d met anyone truly interesting. She was far too tied down with work. But then Katherine knew this was just an excuse. All of those hours spent pouring over architectural plans, obsessing over every detail; they were a convenient way to avoid the painful realities of her personal life. She pretended that she was fulfilled; that her career was all that mattered, but if this were true why was she so terrified to find herself standing beside this attractive man? Why the debilitating sense of dread? It was with more than a hint of fear that she turned to look at him once again, this time deliberately, trying to force an eager expression and a light smile. She wracked her brain for something else to say; anything at all to prod the conversation. But then the doors opened and the man walked briskly from the car. “Good luck,” he said with a nod. “Thank you,” Katherine answered. As the doors closed once again she was hit by a pang of disappointment. Why was she so useless? Before she could consider this question for long, the doors opened on the forty-second floor and Katherine entered the offices of Rutherford and Hayes Architecture, Ltd. She passed the reception desk and nodded to Bernadette, who was busy talking on the phone. Katherine walked down a long hallway and through another open door past the desk of her assistant, Margaret Cleary, who sat tapping away at a computer keyboard. “Good morning Margaret,” said Katherine, trying to muster some enthusiasm. “Hey boss!” Margaret answered. Somehow she always had a reservoir of cheer. Margaret wore a pink cotton dress, with curly dark hair tied back in a bun and black eyeglasses resting on a round, pretty face. “Anything happening around here?” Katherine asked. “Just the usual. Don’t worry, it’s all under control.” “Glad to hear it,” Katherine answered with a sense of relief. Margaret was a take-charge kind of girl and Katherine relied on her to keep the place running smoothly. Katherine moved on into her office and placed the briefcase and her cardboard tubes on a large, cluttered desk. Behind her lay a sweeping view of mid-town Manhattan. Katherine hardly noticed anymore. She was far too focused on her tasks at hand. Thoughts of the man in the elevator quickly receded as she slid a set of blueprints from a tube and spread them on her drafting table. The Caulfield building was exactly the type of challenge she’d dreamed of while in architecture school. Several other top-shelf firms were competing for this job and it was an honor for Katherine to even be included in the bidding process. She wanted this project so badly she could hardly face the prospect of losing the bid. With the announcement of the winner just a day away, Katherine was a nervous wreck. She knew that the Caulfield people would either like it or not and there was nothing else she could do at this point, but the waiting was excruciating. She couldn’t help second-guessing herself, constantly tweaking the plans. It didn’t matter to her that the submissions were already in; the models already completed. She could always offer alternatives, if given the chance. Katherine ducked back into her assistant’s room. “Any news from the Caulfield people?” she asked nervously. “Not yet, boss,” Margaret answered. “Fine,” Katherine nodded. “I don’t want to be bothered by anything else today, all right?” “Sure,” answered Margaret. “I’ll block for you.” “Good,” Katherine replied with a satisfied nod. She walked out to the hallway and down to a small kitchen, where she poured herself another cup of coffee. It wasn’t a latte, but it would have to do. When she returned to her office, Katherine gazed at her blueprints once again. At four stories, the building was of modest size but ambitious in style, with a sweeping metal frame reminiscent of an inverted ship’s hull. The cost would be high but the Caulfield Museum could pay. They wanted to make a statement, not cut corners. As Katherine looked over the drawing she allowed a sense of pride to creep in. She’d done well. Now if only the Caulfield people would agree. She looked up to see Margaret standing uneasily in the doorway, with a sheepish grin. This spelled trouble. “What is it?” Katherine asked. “There’s something I forgot to mention.” Margaret’s face was flushed. “I scheduled a consultation for you this morning.” “What? This morning?” “I’m sorry, it’s just that it’s a really great project! It’s for this lake house…” Margaret sputtered. “A house? I don’t do residential design, Margaret!” She tried not to be upset, but her stress was showing. Katherine took a sip of coffee in an attempt to calm her nerves. “You’ll have to cancel it,” she stated flatly. “But I haven’t told you who it’s for!” said Margaret, trying to mask her own enthusiasm. “I don’t care who it’s for,” Katherine replied. “Can’t I even tell you?” “No,” said Katherine. “The Bancrofts!” Margaret blurted. Now Katherine’s eyes grew wide. “Bancroft? Which Bancroft?” “Nick! Nick Bancroft himself called to request you! I can’t believe I actually spoke to him!” Katherine hesitated while this information sank in. Those two little words made the room go just a little bit blurry. “He said he wouldn’t have any other architect on the project,” Margaret continued. “I guess he’d read about you in the papers. Anyway, he’s building a new lake house up in Connecticut and he wants you to design it. Something modern. Can you imagine? Designing a house for Nick Bancroft?! Isn’t it exciting? I can’t believe I’m going to meet him. Oh my god! Do you think I can get a photo with him?” A full range of emotions crossed Katherine’s face; shock, disbelief and finally a twinge of terror. “Call him back right now and tell him I can’t do it,” said Katherine, growing pale. “But why? How can you…?” “Call him back!” Katherine snapped, showing uncharacteristic anger. “I thought you’d be happy,” said Margaret, realizing now the depth of her mistake. “Just cancel it. Please.” “I’ll try,” said Margaret. “But I think it’s too late.” “What do you mean too late?” “He’s supposed to be here already.” On cue came a knock at the door. A handsome 29-year-old man ducked his head around the threshold. His hair was dark and silky. His cheekbones rugged. “Excuse me,” he said, moving into the room. “Am I interrupting?” His tall frame filled out a perfectly tailored Italian suit. “Mr. Bancroft,” Margaret gazed at him longingly. “Right on time.” Nick Bancroft hardly noticed Margaret. Instead his eyes were glued to her boss. “Hello Katherine,” he managed. “Hi
Nick,” she replied softly as her cup slipped from her grasp and fell toward the
floor, bouncing off her toe and spraying coffee across her slender legs. “Damn it all over…” was all she could think
to say. Chapter Two Once she’d toweled the coffee from her shins, Katherine sat at her desk across from this man whom she hadn’t seen in so many years. She did her best to hide the range of feelings that swirled through her. “Why me?” she asked. “I admire your work,” Nick answered with a half-smile, head cocked to one side. She remembered that smile. It was his playful side. But Katherine wasn’t feeling playful at all. Instead she felt a wave of terror, as though she were looking at a ghost. “There are plenty of other architects,” she said. “Good ones.” “I love the way you make use of materials. I’ve followed your career, you know.” “But you already have a house on the lake. Don’t tell me you’re planning to tear it down!” “No, never!” he protested. “That house has been in the family for generations.” “So?” “That’s my parents’ house. I want something more modern. Something that hasn’t been done before. I have a site all picked out on the other side of the property.” “Which side?” “The cove,” he answered with a sparkle in his eye. Katherine thought back to that summer, so long ago. The summer when Nick Bancroft held her in his arms and kissed her on the shores of that very cove. Her face flushed as she looked at those lips once again. “I’m sorry to have wasted your time, but I don’t do residential design. My assistant should have told you.” “I was hoping you’d make an exception.” “I don’t make exceptions,” she replied curtly. “I’m sorry to hear that,” he said, visibly shaken. Nick Bancroft wasn’t used to hearing no for an answer. But what had he expected? To walk right back into her life after twelve long years? It was all just a fluke back then, she knew. Back when her middle class family spent a summer in Connecticut and she’d somehow caught the eye of the rich and famous Nicholas Bancroft. She was sixteen. One year younger than Nick. That summer was nearly half a life away now and she shuddered to think how he’d changed. Back then he was a shy, conscientious boy, eager to do right by the world. Now he’d become the planet’s biggest playboy, with his antics splashed across the tabloids all around the globe. How he made that transformation, Katherine would never understand. Nor would she forgive him. Katherine knew that the Nick of her childhood no longer existed. Just as the summer sun had faded away, so had the Nick of her memories. Katherine did her best to move on, finishing high school and then college. She focused her energy on her professional life, graduating from architecture school at the top of her class and carving out the beginnings of a successful career. But she’d never stopped wondering what went wrong. What she might have done differently. All she knew for sure was that she’d never heard from him again. “There’s nothing I can do to change your mind?” Nick persisted. “I’m afraid not,” she replied steadfastly. Nick raised both eyebrows and breathed a deep sigh. “All right then,” he said, though he couldn’t hide his disappointment. “I’m sorry to have bothered you.” Before he left, Nick reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a business card. He placed it on the desk before her. “If you change your mind,” he said. “Call me any time.” “It was good to see you again Nick,” Katherine replied brusquely, wishing he would simply leave. “Yes, you too,” he answered with sadness in his voice. When he was gone, Katherine reached down to pick up the card, rubbing a thumb over it as she gazed at the name. She opened a desk drawer, tossed in the card and slammed the drawer shut. Chapter Three “What was he thinking, coming back into my life after all these years?!” Katherine complained to her best friend Amanda as they jogged around the Central Park reservoir in the early evening. “Out of the blue like that?” “I don’t know, I think he’s dreamy,” Amanda replied half-mockingly. “I wish he’d come to my office!” “Amanda, you’re missing the point!” Katherine countered tersely. “Haven’t you been listening to me?” “Yeah. I still think he’s a hunk, though. And so loaded!” “Don’t you see what kind of a man he turned out to be?” “It just looks like he’s having fun to me. Wouldn’t you, if you were that rich? I mean really, that’s what you need in your life; a little more fun.” Katherine slowed, breathing heavily and wiping beads of sweat from her brow. The two friends walked now, side by side. “I don’t have time for fun,” Katherine responded. “Fine, Ms. Workaholic. I still can’t believe you turned down a
commission from Nick Bancroft. How could
you do that?! Even if he wasn’t the most
eligible bachelor in “Can we please talk about something else?” “You brought it up! Geez, what is with you?” “I’m sorry. Maybe you’re right. Maybe I just need a little more fun in my life.” “I’ll say.” “Why don’t we go out for drinks this weekend? How long has it been since we did that?” Katherine offered. “Too long. You spend way too much time in that office of yours.” “All right, how about Saturday? Girl’s night out?” Katherine suggested, trying to sound as though her heart was in it. “Perfect,” Amanda replied, ready to push her advantage. Whatever it took to get her friend out of the house. “You’ll see what a good night out will do for you!” The pair reached Central Park West and crossed the busy street at a traffic light. When they came to West 88th street, Katherine headed off toward her apartment. “What are you doing for dinner? Want to grab some Thai?” Amanda called after her. “No, sorry. I’ve got some blueprints to go over,” Katherine answered. “No kidding,” said Amanda sarcastically. “I’m not going to let you out of Saturday night! A promise is a promise!” “Yes, Saturday night. Can’t wait.” Katherine continued down the block, her elevated heartbeat beginning to ease, her breaths becoming more even. She passed rows of brownstones on either side of the street and looked up at the windows of families who had lived in the neighborhood for generations. She’d grown up only a few blocks away herself. Katherine appreciated the irony of living here, in a 150-year-old apartment, while designing some of the world’s most modern buildings. No matter where her career might eventually take her, this neighborhood kept her grounded. She knew the people. She knew her grocer. She was comfortable here. Katherine loved cutting-edge architectural design, but not to live in. It was part of the reason she didn’t do residential projects. Not even the home of a man like Nick Bancroft. Besides, Katherine had larger aspirations; to design skyscrapers for the next generation. She couldn’t be bogged down with smaller projects. So why did she feel guilty about turning Nick down? This was an opportunity that most architects would die for. If Nick could put their shared history behind them enough to hire her, than why couldn’t she accept? A shudder went through her at the thought. No, she couldn’t do it. She couldn’t answer to him. Not after all of these years. This was too personal even now. Katherine walked up the front steps of her building and unclipped two keys from her left shoe. She let herself in the front door and felt the burn in her thighs as she bounded up three flights of stairs to her apartment door. She turned her own key in three locks, one after the other. It was New York after all, and one could never be too careful. Once inside, she tossed her keys onto a small table where they landed beside Nick’s business card. She hadn’t quite been able to throw it away. Katherine picked up the card and looked it over once again before dropping it back to the table. She headed into the bathroom where she turned on the spigots to fill her cast-iron tub with warm water. She needed to relax. The run had helped, but she was still unsettled. Katherine put on some quiet music. She lit the scented candles arranged on a shelf above the tub and elsewhere around the room; on the windowsill, beside the sink and on top of an old, faded antique dresser in one corner. She flipped off the light switch and the effect was complete, with a pale evening glow coming through an opaque window and candlelight flickering off the walls. When the tub was full Katherine added bath oils and peeled off her clothes. She slid slowly into the tub until the water was up to her chin. She wanted to simply disappear. It was only now, alone with her thoughts, that she could fully consider what this day had unleashed. She’d spent her whole adult life trying to put up a front. She was the career woman with little time for anything else. Only underneath that bluster hid the secret truth. Katherine was desperate for love. She longed for the touch of a man; the simple caress of his fingers against her cheek. She tried to tell herself that it didn’t matter, but she couldn’t hide from the reality of countless dinners alone, sunsets with nobody to share them with, lonely walks in the park. When she saw couples holding hands on the street or kissing on a park bench, it only a intensified the dull ache that never completely went away. Now she wrapped her arms around her knees and curled up into a ball, closing her eyes as she tried to figure out where her life had gone so wrong. Why did she have such a hard time finding a man anyway? She was attractive, wasn’t she? And smart? Perhaps intelligence scared them away. Or maybe she was simply too picky, as some of her friends suggested. But should she really have to settle? Would she be less miserable then? Though Katherine asked herself these questions many times over the years, she never found a satisfying answer. Mostly she just tried to push the longing out of her mind, to forget about it as best she could. So why had it hit her so hard now? Today? That was a question she did know the answer to. The only man she’d ever truly loved was suddenly right in front of her; the man who broke her heart so many years ago. The surge of emotion she felt was almost overwhelming; fear and sadness mixed with deep regret. Katherine thought back to that summer by the lake, when the promise of youth seemed so everlasting. Now it was just the pain that wouldn’t go away. How could she trust anyone in the world, if not the man she’d loved? And how could any man ever compare to the Nick of her dreams, when even that Nick was an illusion? The
Nick she remembered was gallant and kind, with a beautiful soul. He was the only son of Howard and Harriet
Bancroft. The family wealth came from
his mother’s side, originally, but Howard took a small publishing fortune and
turned it into one of the largest media empires in the world. His holdings included newspapers, television
networks, radio stations, publishing houses, a major Internet portal and a Katherine’s
family had come to In Chesterfield Katherine began to change from a shy, timid girl to a beautiful, self-confident young woman. She was turning from the ugly duckling into the swan day by day. Back at her school in New York she was socially invisible; virtually unknown by the more popular kids. Here at the lake she had the status of a worldly, big-city girl. She was coming into her own. She still never expected Nick Bancroft to take notice, much less fall in love. But fall in love he had, at least she believed at the time. At the end of that summer Nick headed off for his senior year at a boarding school upstate. He was back with his own friends. What use did he have for a shy sixteen year-old girl from the Upper West Side? He’d promised to call her but never did. He’d promised to write her a letter a day, but his silence was unbearable. Over the ensuing years Katherine never felt that spark of love again. Nick had set the bar too high. She still compared every man she ever met to the soul mate who no longer seemed to exist. What made Nick Bancroft so hard to forget, more than anything, were the nearly constant headlines. These days he was photographed with numerous movie starlets and others in the Gotham cognoscenti. Katherine tried to square this image of the boy behaving badly with the Nick she had known, yet there he was on the cover of the Daily News kissing a young actress in drunken revelry or crashing his Maserati on the Amalfi Coast. Nick was swallowed by the excess of a spoiled life. Katherine wondered if the kind, gallant Nick was still inside him somewhere just waiting to come back out. These days it was harder to believe than ever, now that he was tied to the pop star Fiona Bingham. A woman like that made Katherine’s skin crawl, with her sexy outfits and lurid music, yet Nick actually appeared to be dating her. The Nick she remembered would never be caught dead with a woman like that. Would he? Of course she really shouldn’t care at this point, but the truth was that she just couldn’t help it. As Katherine sat in the bathtub considering these things, a sobering realization descended upon her. It was entirely possible that she might never fully get over Nick. If she hadn’t after this long, why would she ever? This anguish might torment her until her dying day. Katherine pictured herself as an elderly woman, still yearning for the promise of lost youth that only Nick Bancroft could represent. Was there no alternative? No way to save herself from this agonizing fate? There was one possible solution. If Nick was really the source off all of her loneliness then perhaps it was time to face the problem directly. She needed to prove to herself once and for all that the Nick she’d known no longer existed. She needed to see firsthand that this new Nick was the only one there was. If she could be convinced that her fantasy was just that, then maybe she could finally move on with her life. It just might be the only way she could ever regain her sanity. Katherine rose from the tub and took a towel from a rack on the wall. She dried off her body and then her hair. She wrapped this first towel around her head and secured a second one under her arms before walking across her apartment to the foyer. She lifted Nick’s business card from the table. She knew that if she hesitated she might change her mind, so instead she picked up her phone and quickly dialed the number. “Hello?” Nick answered on the other end. “It’s Katherine. I’ll do it,” she blurted out. “What?” he asked confusedly. “Call my assistant in the morning. We’ll set up a consultation.” And with that she hung up the phone, wondering in her heart if she’d just made a terrible mistake. |
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